It's Always Foggy in the Upper Haight

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Three Wishes Official Wine Review

Since Jenny Bradley is such a big fan of cheap wine, I thought it would make sense to do a wine review of Three Wishes. For those of you who don’t know, Three Wishes is Whole Foods’ response to Trader Joe’s 2 buck chuck. What makes me qualified to review this wine? Well, I just so happen to be the manager of a wine store. Which wine store you ask? Well, I’m not going to say, because where I work we exude a certain level of professionalism which I have no intention of replicating here. So eat a dick.

I chose to review the Cabernet Sauvignon because that’s what JB is currently curled up on the couch with. The nose is intense cherry and strawberry, a little honey, and some unnameable artificial shit. On the palate the wine is best described as “flacid” because it is weak in structure and the word “flacid” makes me giggle. Again, flavors of red fruit, red licorice, with tannins that are somewhat grippy. It’s probably best that the wine only has 12.5% alcohol, otherwise I think it would be too hot (ie the booze would burn your throat).

When drinking a wine of this caliber, you have to keep 2 things in mind:

1) Three Wishes does not come from grapes that are pressed, fermented, aged, etc. without much intervention. In other words, some guys take grape juice, begin to make it into wine, and then do whatever is within their physical -and more importantly legal- capacity to make it not taste like shit. They add stuff here, remove stuff there, mix in this chemical, and God knows what else.

2) You’re not drinking Three Wishes for the taste; you’re drinking it to either get a mild buzz or completely wrecked. So enjoy it for what it is: a fruity, alcoholic beverage that tastes kinda like wine and makes for a great companion on a Wednesday night.

Posted by DanInSF

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  1. jennybradley reblogged this from upperhaightfog and added:
    Dan reviews my favorite wine! It’s all true!
  2. daninsf reblogged this from upperhaightfog
  3. upperhaightfog posted this